Sassy Sally: The Zine

I decided to make an awesome Zine! So far I've written an introductory statement.  I'd really like to put on there "Editor's note" or "From the desk of the Editor-in-chief" or something overinflated like that.  Anyways, I hope the zine comes out cool, I figure now that I have two free days that I'm not spending in my studio at school, plus no car to go anywhere, I can work on this and count it as legitimate work.  Plus, since I have high hopes of being a writer, maybe this is the kind of idiosyncratic thing I can use as a portfolio or something one day.

Here it is.  The inaugural issue of Sassy Sally: The Zine.  I kind of feel like this is a hard-copy sequel to my ongoing, formerly eponymous blog.  

Who is Sassy Sally? Well, ol’ Sally is kind of like my alter-ego.  I think of her as a hybrid creature, comprised of Darlene Conner, Enid Coleslaw, and Daria.  With a little bit of Elaine from Seinfeld thrown in for good measure.  Sassy Sally is the spritely postmodern reincarnate within a world that keeps tacking on more pointless, self-negating prefixes.  I think we’ve now crossed the frontier into Post-Post-Post-Modernism.  Anyways, that’s the perspective from whom I write.  Come to think of it, I don’t think Sassy Sally is my alter-ego, as much as she’s my analogous-ego.  But with a snappier, alliterated name.  

In real life, I am a multi-media and process-based visual artist.  I’m vehemently obsessed with the tactile, and I love the dollar store more than anything, for its endless supply of cheap, colorful and sensory-stimulating items.  I hate crowds, I’m an eternal scab-picker, I furiously write to-do lists that often include the task “write to-do list”, and dogs speak to my heart more than human beings ever could.  Basically, what it comes down to is this: I am a twenty-two year old almost-BFA-grad, who is plagued with self-doubt, insecurity, and uncertainty.  I fancy myself both ambitious and incredibly lazy (an archetypal quality of the Millenial generation).  I don’t know how to put together an outfit properly, and more than likely, I’m threatened by you.  

Maybe one day I’ll expand and get an “Ask Sassy Sally” advice column.